On the Verge of Explosion

Wow, I wrote this nearly ten years ago...  Perhaps I was desperate for love.  Or to love. 
Hmmm... Was?  Perhaps that want (need) never really goes away.  In my eyes, there is always room for more explosions...

Why can’t I love?
How hard is it to reach out my hands and place them gently on you,
Letting you know that my affections are true?
In my mind’s eye, I caress and love you.
I lean in close to you and feel your warm breath mix with mine,
And we remain wrapped in each other’s grip.
With hour bleeding into hours, we truly love.
Then I blink, and my mind’s eye slowly fades to blindness,
Making my reality sink in even further . . .
I will never love.
Fatally flawed and destined to be alone.
No, I demand! No!
Only when I learn to leave the eyes open
That my mind and heart truly desire to witness will I ever begin to love.
Then, watch out.
For a love that has been bottled up for over 26 years only has room to explode.